My Blog :: Random musings that occur to me ...

New Year's Resolutions!
12:02AM on January 01, 2009

Hi all -

Just wanted to start the year out right by putting some thoughts down - these are profound - you may want to write this stuff down!!!  LOL

I resolve:
- To take better care of myself healthwise
- To stress less and have more fun
- To have more sex
- To get my website up and running
- To keep in contact with my friends a bit better
- To spend more time smiling and less time crying

Happy New Years all!!!

I know I've been kind of quiet lately ...
12:07AM on August 28, 2008

I haven't been on Rude much lately - but I haven't been just ignoring you all ... I've been busy - I'm working hard on my new website and yahoo group!!  Am hoping to make a big announcement soon - feel kind of like I did when I gave birth!!

You guys are all in my thoughts - just hope you haven't forgotten me!!  Will let you know in the next week or so about the new site and all the fun stuff contained therein - hope you come and visit!

xoxo Chelsea ;-)

Lemonade ...
5:17PM on July 19, 2008

Well, I think this entire year thus far has been about giving me lemons and heaven knows I've been trying to make lemonade, but it's never quite right.  So, once my son went to spend the summer with his dad, I left to spend some time with my family ... you know, the ones that are supposed to love you? Well, we do love one another, but after almost a month with them, I am certain that I don't want to live that close to them .. there's a reason that I'm here and they're there!  I love them dearly and thank the Lord that I have them to prop me up when things go south, but heaven help me if we lived in the same damn town!!  I've spent the last month being treated like a 12 year old - I've listened to every financial horror story, how things were when they were young and what I should do with my life and how I should be bringing up my son that I could possibly listen to - and there were some good suggestions ... just made me realize that I could do much of it right where I'm at!

So, Mom and Dad - I love ya dearly - but this girl is sticking in Pennsylvania and going to be smarter about things and try to make it right here.  I'll come visit when I can, I'll call when I need a friendly voice but my life is here.

Of course the other issue is that I don't think that they'd appreciate my 'pervin personality' in that small town in Michigan ... so I'll hang here and count on my Rude buddies for a bit of support when I need it!

Stay cool everyone!  xoxo Chelsea

New site cumming!
2:42PM on June 13, 2008

Guess what?!?!  I'm getting my own site ... I'll post the URL and other info once I get it launched (sometime early next week).  I figured since I have time on my hands due to unemployment - might as well give it a go ...

Can't wait to show you all a little more of Chelsea Rose!

Watch for more info - def cumming soon!  xoxoxo

To my friends ... a bit of an apology
5:38PM on June 01, 2008

All - i've not been on line or participating in things much lately ... have been trying to keep focused on 'the real world' for a while.  Of course, the real world is boring and I miss my Rude buddies.  A couple more weeks and the boy goes to stay with his dad for the summer and then I'll have a little time off for 'me' time - who knows where I might pop up!

I hope you all are having good times - take care and thank you for being such a positive part of my life!

I love you all!  oxoxo

Remember ...
12:09PM on May 26, 2008

Every Memorial Day weekend we anticipate a long weekend away from work - warm days, the smell of grilling hamburgs, hot dogs, veggies, steaks .... a cold beer or a glass of tart lemonade. It's the start of the summer season - kids' thoughts turn to the end of school and a long summer vacation.

While all that is great - do you ever get a chill when you look at Old Glory waving in the breeze? Do you think about the men and women that gave their lives throughout history to give us the things that we often take for granted? The soldiers at Valley Forge who froze and starved and never fired a shot; the brothers who fought against one another during the Civil War because they believed that their way of life was the best; those that fought the first War to End all Wars; the men who died when the Japenese bombed Pearl Harbor; the men and women who went to a far off land called Korea to help stop the spread of Communism; the men who came home from Vietnam and were called 'baby killers'; the men who never came back at all because no one knows what happened to them; the men and women who went and are going to the desert ...

Those men and women and their families have given up so much to give us the ability to relax today - let's remember that and say a little prayer for all of them and say thank you. Remember when you see the flag and hear the Star Spangled Banner being sung and when you hear Taps at the cemetery - this day off was not granted without sacrifice ....

Just a rant!
11:59PM on May 06, 2008

I hate it when I get emails from women professing to be the girlfriend/wife/significant other of a man I'm friends with and then they accuse me of shit I haven't even done!! I'm not trying to get in between you and your man - maybe we are just friends - maybe we're not, but if I knew about you - I wouldn't be seeing him ...

Don't be accusing me of stuff when you should look into your own relationship first!

Black clouds lighten
11:14AM on April 26, 2008

My last blog lamented the fact that lots of things kept going wrong in my life.  Well, I'm not saying I'm out of the woods, but I've had a couple of things go in the direction I was hoping and the black cloud that seems to be hanging over my head SEEMS to be lightening up a bit.  Keep those positive thoughts coming for me - I could see blue sky soon!

And, just as an aside, blue sky means a better mood for Chelsea and more sex!  More sex means more vids and pics!!!  I hope, I hope, I hope!!!!

Take care all - your hopeful friend, Chelsea xoxoxo
 

Why is it ?
10:45PM on April 06, 2008

Why is it that everytime I think that things are better - or are on the way to better - something bad happens to screw it up?  I was thinking that I was on the good side of all this crap that I've been dealing with lately and a new thing comes to me to screw with my life ...

When do I get a bit of good luck?

Spring Break is over ... the real world beckons!
1:55PM on March 30, 2008

I had a first last week - I finally 'went away' for Spring Break!  When I was in college, I always wanted to be one of those that got to go someplace exotic for spring break - Ft Lauderdale, Cancun, New Orleans, etc.  There was always an excuse as to why I couldn't go ... I have to work, I was married, I didn't have any money, blah  blah blah.  So, this last week, I went to Tucson for spring break!

Of course, it wasn't the bikini wearing, beer drinking, drunken booty fest that I imagined in college - it was a trip to visit my parents, with my 12 year old son in a 55 and over trailer park.  No drinking for sure; I wore my two piece bathing suit twice (which was twice more than I wore it last year!); and DEFINITELY no booty!!!  While it wasn't all that - it was a relaxing time to spend with my family.  We did some sightseeing, played cards and dominos, went out to eat and picked oranges from the orange tree in my parents' back yard.  Whoo hoo, right?

I've been off from work since the middle of January - had myself a bit of a 'breakdown' - so this week was the culmination of spending some time away from the 'real world' and getting prepared for going back.  Hopefully, this time has made me stronger and I can get back to the business of working and being the best I can be - perhaps a new job is in my future, but for now, I'm taking one day at a time and hoping that I don't take a step back to the dark place that has been dogging me for so long.

So, I guess bikini wearing, beer drinking, drunken booty fests are something that I won't be experiencing in my lifetime, but I think there's some wildness left in me!  Perhaps there's a friend or two on Rude that can help me with that!  ;-)

 

Happy Birthday to Me!!
9:39AM on March 16, 2008

Well yesterday I turned a year older - funny, I don't feel older!  When I think of my chronological age, I think it just can't be true ... I don't feel like I'm 'middle aged!'  I just thank God that I'm able to get up every morning and kiss my son and hang with my friends - both physically and virtually ...sometimes it's hard to remember your blessings and it's easy to get bogged down in all the stuff that doesn't really mean much.  What's that saying ... "Don't sweat the small stuff ....and it's ALL small stuff."  I'm going to make that my mantra for the next year - I've already spent too much of my life worrying about things that I may not be able to change.

Today, as I wax poetic over my life and my day yesterday - I can say that I'm very grateful and appreciative of friends and family.  My immediate family is actually far away and they all contacted me yesterday with a wish for my special day.  My 12 year old son, who doesn't like to be 'uncool' by showing his sensitive side - gave me a hug and a kiss and wished me happy birthday a few times yesterday.  And my awesome girlfriends shared my day with me by taking me out to celebrate ... unfortunately we had to scale back our plans due to an unexpected illness yesterday afternoon - but no worries Brooke, the Men of the Cave are still waiting for us - Tracy and I wouldn't go without you!! 

I am also grateful for my open minded friends that understand the need for a girl to 'get her freak on' when she needs to - to my drinking and play partner from last evening - AWESOME!!!  I'll let you eat 'cake' anytime you want!!

Finally - to my chaueffer and drink buyer - thank you for being such a good friend ... I'm glad that things worked out in a positive way last night.  After the boob job, the next thing we're buying for you is a damned GPS so you don't get lost in your own backyard!!  (Ya know I love ya baby!!)

For the thoughts and wishes from each of you ... thank you!  You made my day!  oxoxo

Wow - this blog thing is harder than I thought!
10:07AM on March 05, 2008

No wonder I've never been able to have a diary or a journal ... I can't seem to get into a habit of writing down my thoughts every day ... heaven knows I have a lot of them - thoughts, that is.  Just seems that they're never important enough to write down since I don't know that anyone will ever want to read them!

The last few weeks have been a bit disjointed.  I'm still off from work and at some point, I suppose I have to go back.  I KNOW that I don't want to go back - at least not to the same situation from which I came.  I'd like to think I could easily change the situation, but I don't think so.  I've been trying to keep busy - but nothing really 'floats my boat,' so to speak.

I've had a few adventures of a sexual nature, but still, nothing that seems to really be like WOW ... no offense intended to my partner(s) - hopefully I've been a bit more memorable than I feel!

Last night the wind blew mightily and the rain came down - today, the sun is coming out, but the wind seems to have blown in a bit more winter.  The robins look like they're pretty cold ... will the winter ever end?  I was kind of hoping a big wind would blow this dark cloud out of my mind/head/life ... so far, it's still hanging on - any suggestions as to how to get rid of it?

Honest - I didn't know anyone was reading this!
7:55PM on February 20, 2008

I was just a little bored tonight, went back into my blog to re-read what I wrote and found out that a few people have actually been reading and been making some comments!  I'm feeling pretty bad about the fact that I hadn't acknowledged the comments ... so for those of you that have read and commented  - thank you!

I've been off from work for about 4 weeks now - I'm getting a little tired of being home, but I'm not sure that I'm ready for the stress of the office along with everything else.  Having this little 'breakdown' has given me new things to think about - never thought I was a 'fragile' type - but guess life gets to everyone now and then.  We all deal with it differently or at different times - guess mine was a bit of delayed reaction after all the things that happened to me this last year - my spouse moving out, the failure of a 2nd marriage, the stress of making sure that I'm doing the right thing for my kid, having a very close play partner leave me after 2 years. moving, not being able to keep up with the bills ... blah blah blah.

I hate feeling like a whiner about my life.  Everyone has issues, not sure why I think my issues were more crazy than others.  Just never figured that I'd be in this particular position at this time in my life ... well, when life hands you lemons ... right?

I have become so thankful for my Rude friends - what started out as a lark has turned out to be a place with really great people and some very good friends.  What a pleasant surprise!  Mwah!!!

Valentine's Day thoughts
8:02PM on February 13, 2008

Well, pre-Valentine's Day thoughts anyway .....

I love romance and hearts and flowers and all that 'sappy' stuff.  I believe in love and in the fact that there is someone out there for each and every one of us.  In some cases, some of us haven't found that special someone .... in my case, I keep looking and interviewing candidates, but the right one hasn't been found, yet.  But I'm hopeful .... someday, that special someone will be right in front of my face, when I least expect it, he'll be there.

But after all that ... I'm not looking forward to Valentine's Day this year.  I have no special someone - I don't expect a card or flowers or a box of candy ... just a hug and a kiss from my son and a wish from my parents.  While that is nice, it's certainly not the same as lovin' from that special person.  Maybe next year .....

A new addition ...
11:21PM on February 06, 2008

I have talked about getting a tattoo for about 15 years.  My reasons for not getting one were varied ... it's going to hurt too much, it's too expensive; my parents will have heart failure; what's it going to look like when I'm 80 ... blah blah blah ...

Well, today, I did it!!  I went to visit a friend in Delaware and he took me to his favorite tattoo/piercing shop near Bear and I had a great artist named Jamie give me his best rendition of a red rose and it was placed on my left breast.    I can show my rose when I wear a low cut shirt or leave some buttons undone, or I can 'hide' it when necessary.  I picked the rose because it seemed feminine and sexy and reminds me that even when things are beautiful, there's always a thorn or two hiding there somewhere.

Sorry Mom and Dad ... I just had to do it ... my apologies for the heart palipations that this will cause.  Getting the tattoo didn't really hurt - I mean, I gave birth - it wasn't THAT bad!  It wasn't that expensive - at least not enough to make me doubt my decision.  Now, what it's going to look like when I'm 80 ... hell, I'm going to be the hottest chick in the retirement community!!! 

What have I learned today? That sometimes you just have to do something without spending a lot of time analyzing ... I know it's just a small tattoo, and some of  you probably think I'm making too much of something so insignificant, but for me, it was a big leap into a new me!

Shopping!
4:32PM on February 05, 2008

My best girl friend and I went to the new premium factory outlet stores near Pottstown, Pennsylvania today.  Great bunch of stores, Coach, Tommy Hilfiger, Neimann Marcus, Oakley, Bali,  DKNY, Maidenform .... all high end stores with pretty good prices.

We had the most fun in the Maidenform store - panties and bras for 50% off, corsets and nighties 25% off.  She and I are both underwear freaks - I MUST wear matching panties and bras - so I found black, white, pink and red.  I also bought a new black nightie .... sure wish I had someone to wear it for!  Any one want a fashion show?

I also bought some new brown heels.  Can't wait to wear them to work!

I love shopping - just wish I had more money to buy some more cool stuff!  I definitely need a sugar daddy! ;-)

Stupid Groundhog!
11:08AM on February 02, 2008

Not sure why I think that Punxatawney Phil is any great predictor of weather, but that stupid groundhog NEVER gives us a break ... he saw his shadow today, so they say, so another six weeks of winter for all of us.  I will say however, that if winter is going to continue to be like it has been - rain and cold and very little snow, I guess I can handle it.  This Michigan transplant is used to lots of snow, so winter in Pennsylvania isn't really so bad!

C'mon Phil - for once, tell us it's going to be sunny and 70 next week!!  :-)

End of the month
11:38PM on January 31, 2008

Damn - where did this month go?  Feels like it was just Christmas and now I have to start thinking about Valentine's Day!  Of course, this year, I don't have a special Valentine :-(  No one special to do romantic things with/for ... I'm not complaining and I'm not going to go out and jump into a relationship with someone just because I want a Valentine!  The observation means that I am going to continue to take each day as it comes and look for opportunities where they may present themselves.

Funny the way life works ...I knew that my marriage was over and that I didn't want to be with my spouse any longer, but I never expected to be a single mom in a place far away from my family and my support network.  Things have been difficult for me in the last month or so - I've found support in surprising places ... and been surprised about where support has NOT come from ...

Every day is an adventure to enjoy ... I just have to keep remembering that!

A new experience today ...
4:38PM on January 30, 2008

Today I had a new experience ... I was spanked by someone who really knows how!!  I have a hot, red ass - not sure that I'm ready to say I like it, but I do like the way my ass feels now, after we got done playing!  I have decided I'm not much of a pain girl ... guess you have to ease me into it.

I think I'm going to write a story about it ... watch for it!

I hate winter!
7:20PM on January 29, 2008

Actually - I just hate cold, gray days where rain tries to fall and the wind blows cold.  If it's going to be winter - snow, dammit!  Personally, I'd be happy with 75 degrees and blue skies with puffy white clouds so I could sit on the deck and enjoy the day.  Someday, I'll find that place ... and the special someone that belongs there with  me - for now, I'll keep looking ....