Secrets
12:31AM on February 21, 2010
I wonder to myself in this my second Blog whether this is separate issue or rather a natural progression from my first " Whom Do We Trust " , I guess you will make your own minds up on that one but I lean towards the latter .
Secrets an emotive issue , we all have secrets of all kinds some trivial such as guilty pleasures , or a little more serious like passwords , rising through more serious ones which embarrass or trouble us or which we don`t wish to be known for other reasons .
But how much does the retention of such secrets impact on our daily lives , some obviously have severe consequences such as criminal acts or an addiction or an illicit relationship , these are not necessarily the type I mean well not this sense any way .
I`m groping for the right words here to express my intent , so please bear with me, I`m by nature cautious of revealing too much .
What I am trying to say is is do your secrets affect the way you see the world and interact with people ?, I wonder how much of past difficulties such as my alcoholism were as a result of not revealing and there by dealing with experiences which remain secret , well the details at least . Going further back did events shape my character or did my character inspire the events . I will not reveal my secret here , I haven`t revealed it to anyone ever, I will only say it relates to the subject of a very recent Blog by another friend, those of my friends reading this who have read it , will probably guess it`s nature . Sorry for those for whom it doesn`t make sense , but somethings , some secrets affect us profoundly , for instance Soldiers will discuss amongst themselves areas they have seen combat , but never the details . I wonder if secrets shape our sexuality too , because sometimes that sexuality itself becomes another secret or vice versa , where by as I firmly believe our sexuality is fixed at birth . This in it`s self was a secret I retained until fairly recently until making good friends here on Rude , who made it possible to open up aspects . Most of you no doubt have close family , close friends in physical world probably from child hood or partners with whom you share secrets ?. For my part I have none of these , my family is not a close knit one , I have not friendships off-line and my partner has enough concerns without me adding to them , so this was an attempt to cleanse my soul as it were , which has not been entirely successful .Perhaps I`ll give the matter more thought , but your thoughts on this thorny issue will be most welcome and may help clarify my thinking , so I thank you in advance for your interest .
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