Yes It's true SaXXX Did Not Go to The AVN as I wanted to
12:30PM on January 09, 2011
 Hey People I got to behind and money was very tight, so I made the choice like a week before the AVN Not To Go. "Shit Happens" Right? Yes I was very sad about it, but it gave me some much needed time and I saved that monies and bought myself a brand spankin new HD Cam Corder YEA! Yes I know everyone thing I got it like that, But people the truth is none of us have it like we want it all the time. So I know there a few that will be like" good that icth", But It was my choice and not that I couldn't it was more like what can I do with this money I saved to better help, and produce for myself. There is something to be said about going it alone, and really this year I really want to do a lot of my on footage, be it not so pro, but it will be mine. I am thankful to all that have helped me in learning all this Tech stuff that I now know. LOL! I know it was hard on you cause Im slow when it comes to such things, but I hope to improve on it all. I feel that I need to give it at least a really hard try, to be better to myself, I run from here to there shooting with others, all the time and now I have the means of inviting, neewbies, amatuers, and other to my little studio here and do my own little thing.
Also this year I am celebrating my independence from a lot of things, last year and the year before that was very hard on me, I lost alot, my mom died, I made a very hard choice to leave the guy I was with for almost 6 years, and I made the choice let go of few friendships (NYC/DC/FL) that just was not working out, some of it was because of my on and off agian issues,but none of my issue's harms a person heart or soul though (Im owning up to it). Shit it's hard trying to navagate it all. Im telling the TRUTH here so you all can hear me say it. People love to twist shit, and paint me as "let me us some of there words that have hurt me at times, words like(Bitch, Lush, Stupid, Silly, dumb etc.) and not in playful ways and maybe Im to sensitive. (people I am not as hard core as you may think) I am Girly! Im only hard when backed into a corner.
You my fans can understand how words such as those to someone you consider a friend can hurt. But to my Fans and those who truly enjoy and like me I am human, just because I am 43 does not mean I have it all together all the time and I have such a crazy life I do it all on my own, and in some ways they may be right. But People always remember there are two sides to every gossiping whisper. My belief is this,True Freinds never insult each other, they may disagree, argue a point of veiw, and take time out from each other, But never put you down. Or make you feel less than. So I decided to let lose and let go without disliking or hating anyone. Maybe we are all just wrong for the task, who knows....................
So enough with that aaawww poor SaXXX Shit! LOL! Really Im good though, You live you learn RIGHT? as one of my ex friends would say, Lol! I am doing things my way this year and I took the the time I would have used to go to Vegas and monies and spent them both well! I got a nice new Cam, fixed up the SaXXX Suite here in Jersey, any one In and around New Jersey, New York want to drop in and sit a spell, SaXXX's Suite is always open for FUN, No snuttiness here and I promise to show you nothing but love. So, now I could bring to you my fans and those that really do like me my crazy ass ways and all, me doing me, and I hope to make great strides in bettering myself, my talents, as a producer, RudeStar, my Sex scenes, my mind, and my heart. I hope that you my fans will join me in my endeavor's to improve and be an uplift to me and all, not a critical insult to my Spirit and/or others. I will try to keep you up to date with great amatuer vids, like my Freebie's, clips, pictures, blogs and adventures. Hey! Im learning, I want to spend more time at home so I can get my scehdule on point, I miss doing my live Rude shows. So lets try to be kinder to each other and have some Real Sexy Perving Fun! OKAY? Okay!
Ur Favorite Gal Pal SaXXX!
Oh yeah and Be on the look out for my new project ! my Alter-Ego "Ma Ma MILF! She's old school wickedly Funny, Telling everyone How it T-R-U-L-Y IS! LOL!
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