I am so sorry my rude buddies...
6:01PM on September 14, 2009

Im sorry, but i have 2 BE REAL WITH ALL MY FANS...........i HAVE BEEN SUFFERING FROM A DEEP DARK DEPRESSION.

I just went to florida and put on a great face for my girls, but even though they are my heart and soul, I still felt quit bad. alot has happen and has been going on with me for some time, I can cover my inside pain good huh?

Anyway,Sometimes I wish I chould just fade away, but then my passions just keep bring me back to you my online fans. I feel safer this way then risking freindships personallly. Because noone can understand my personal stuggles and I get hurt so and I hate letting freinds down because I don't meet there expectations, People see me as this got shit going type supa diva, NO Im not. Im really very shy and very much an intervert, I love peaceful things. Shit I'm forty-two, you have to slow down at sometime right, LOL! 
Im learning to adjust and respond and deal with my depression so everyone just pray for me please, I hope to be back on with you all soon I hope. I have really been considering quiting all together, but I like having fun with you all and that's all  I want, is to enjoy my life the way it is, with no drama, I don't have the need to be the best or a star, I just want to shine in my own humble little way.

I love you all that has given me  such positive comments and just been fun to enjoy ur interest in little old me, lol!


Wish me Blessing and if u can, just alittle cool ass prayer to help me over come my DEMONS!

LUV U ALL, Ur Gal Pal SaXXX