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Would U Like to Be Part Of the Hottest Calender On The Internet!
9:01AM on January 15, 2010
Hovaz Angelz is trying to come out with a Calender and T-Shirts. I trying to create a production company
straight from a small platform such as rude. Im always working on something new on the internet. So if any
body on rude or any body need any video edited or pictures edited just give me five dollars in rude chips
which is nothing really. Hovaz Angelz is not a escort service. All proseeds will go towards Hovaz Angelz
projects...
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Group shows please read
11:48AM on March 23, 2009
e Please pass this on ...................
PLEASE READ THIS AND PASS IT ON
FROM RudeKenny .............................
GROUP SHOWS MUST HAVE SOUND !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hi fellow Rudies please take note that based on some confusion in respect to group shows i have had to make a point of making this a rule on the site from now on, Group shows must have sound, two reasons
1/ If you dont have sound there seems little point in doing a group show, you may as well be in your live house.
2/ They need to be interactive because thats what your fans are paying for and of course the bottom line if the members hear you moan and groan they are happier by far so please make sure you are heard from now on,
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7 stages of sex
11:03AM on February 26, 2009
SEVEN KINDS OF SEX
Results of recent research shows that there are 7 kinds of sex.
The 1st! kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex. *This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone, and you both have sex until you are blue in the face.
The 2nd kind of sex is called: Kitchen Sex. *This is when you have been with your partner for a short time, and you are so needy you will have sex anywhere, even in the kitchen.
The 3rd kind of sex is called: Bedroom Sex.
*This is when you have been with your partner for a long time. Your sex has gotten routine ,and you usually have sex only in your bedroom.
The 4th kind of sex is called: Hallway Sex *This is when you have been with your partner for too long. When you pass each other in the hallway you both say 'screw you.'
The 5th kind of sex is called: Religious Sex.
*Which means you get Nun in the morning, Nun in the afternoon and Nun at night. (Very Popular)
The 6th kind is called Courtroom Sex. *This is when you cannot stand your wife any more. She takes you to court and screws you in front of everyone.
And; Last, but not least, The 7th kind of sex is called: Social Security! Sex. *You get a little each month. But not enough to enjoy yourself.
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| Comments |
 TheFr... |
March 06, 2009 (Report It)
Great blog! Needed this laugh! |
 LV_2_... |
March 01, 2009 (Report It)
i like the 3rd one that was funny good blog hova |
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The urge to satisfy.
1:58PM on February 07, 2009
It was 4 in the morning, and in my sleep I could feel the wetness between her thighs. There was a tingling inside—an urge to be filled up by me. Just when I thought I couldn’t bear the urge any more, there she was, climbing on top of me, spreading her legs, entering her hot, wanting crevice. I was in heaven, experiencing orgasms at an exhausting rate, sounding off once, even twice, each minute as the pressure became nearly unbearable.
I pulled her hair and bit her neck. her body crashed into mine, and the ramming lead to swelling and swelling led to moist, warm kisses to her pink, sensitive flesh. She sucked the milky white juice from inside me and caressed my most tender parts with her tongue. She squirmed. I shook. I came.
Her eyes remained closed as she turned me over, I placing several pillows under her, exposing her pudenda, leaving her vulnerable and anxious. I slipped a finger into one hole and two into the other as I licked and sucked around them. I worked digits deep inside until we were both covered in cream. After sucking them clean, I thrust my tongue deep inside her tightest .She hollered in pleasurable pain. Never had she been so satisfied.
She had to look me in the eyes and show her my contentment. I had to open my eyes and face this mad sexual deviant. I reached behind to bring her to me, to taste her kiss and the pieces of me in it. I reached behind to find her gone, to find she was never there. She had never been there. That morning I’d come to know myself as a Man, as a beast, as the greatest lover she ever had.
Hova..
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 LV_2_... |
March 01, 2009 (Report It)
mmm the beginiing wass do damm sexy this type of great sex dosent happen to me lol muahzzz hova |
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HATERS
11:27PM on January 29, 2009
A hater is someone who is jealous and envious and spends all their
time trying to make you look small so they can look tall.
They are very negative people to say the least. Nothing is ever
good enough!
When you make your mark, you will always attract some haters...
That's why you have to be careful with whom you share your
blessings and your dreams, because some folk can't handle seeing
you blessed...
It's dangerous to be like somebody else... If God wanted you to be
like somebody else, He would have given you what He gave them! Right?
You never know what people have gone through to get what they
have...
The problem I have with haters is that they see my glory, but they
don't know my story...
If the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence, you
can rest assured that the water bill is higher there too!
We've all got some haters among us!
Some people envy you because you can:
a) Have a relationship with God
b) Light up a room when you walk in
c) Start your own business
d) Tell a man / woman to hit the curb
(if he / she isn't about the right thing)
e) Raise your children without both parents being
in the home
Haters can't stand to see you happy.
Haters will never want to see you succeed.
Most of our haters are people who are supposed to be
on our side.
How do you handle your undercover haters?
You can handle these haters by:
1. Knowing who you are & who your true friends are
*(VERY IMPORTANT!!)
2. Having a purpose to your life: Purpose does not
mean having a job. You can have a job and still be
unfulfilled.
A purpose is having a clear sense of what God has called you to be.
Your purpose is not defined by what others think about you.
3. By remembering what you have is by divine
prerogative and not human manipulation.
Fulfill your dreams! You only have one life to live...when its your
time to leave this earth, you 'want' to be able to say, 'I've lived my
life and fulfilled 'my' dreams,... Now I'm ready to go HOME!
When God gives you favor, you can tell your haters, 'Don't look at
me...Look at Who is in charge of me...'
Pass this to all of your family & friends who you know are
not hating on you including the person who sent it to you.
If you don't get it back, maybe you called somebody out!
Don't worry about it, it's not your problem, it's theirs..
Just pray for them, that their life can be as fulfilled as
yours! Watch out for Haters...BUT most of all don't become
a HATER!
HOva said so
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| Comments |
 xCaro... |
December 01, 2011 (Report It)
Very well said !!! 5 * Then there are those who try and intimidate you ...... |
 LV_2_... |
March 01, 2009 (Report It)
omg ur so right alot haters on rude too |
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Birthday animals
11:19AM on December 01, 2008
January 01 - 09 ~ Ass
January 10 - 24 ~Slug
January 25 - 31 ~Cockroach
February 01 - 05 ~ Parasite
February 06 - 14 ~Bullfrog
February 15 - 21 ~Skunk
February 22 - 28 ~ Snake
March 01 - 12 ~ Ape
March 13 - 15 ~Cockroach
March 16 - 23 ~ Slug
March 24 - 31 ~ Parasite
April 01 - 03 ~ Ass
April 04 - 14 ~ Snake
April 15 - 26 ~ Slug
April 27 - 30 ~ Skunk
May 01 - 13 ~ Slug
May 14 - 21 ~ Bullfrog
May 22 - 31 ~ Cockroach
June 01 - 03 ~ Slug
June 04 - 14 ~ Skunk
June 15 - 20 ~ Ass
June 21 - 24 ~ Ape
June 25 - 30 ~ Parasite
July 01 - 09 ~ Slug
July 10 - 15 ~ Ass
July 16 - 26 ~ Bullfrog
July 27 - 31 ~ Parasite
August 01 - 15 ~ Ape
August 16 - 25 ~ Slug
August 26 - 31 ~ Skunk
September 01 - 14 ~ Bullfrog
September 15 - 27 ~ Parasite
September 28 - 30 ~ Ass
October 01 - 15 ~ Ape
October 16 - 27 ~ Skunk
October 28 - 31 ~ Snake
November 01 - 16 ~Cockroach
November 17 - 30 ~Parasite
December 01 - 16 ~ Ass
December 17 - 25 ~ Ape
December 26 - 31 ~ Bullfrog
If you are an Ass : A very loyal and sweet person. Your loyalty can never be doubted. You are quite honest and sincere when it comes to your attitude towards working. You are a very simple person, indeed. Absolutely hassle free, humble, and down-to-earth! ! That explains the reason why your friends cling on to you! You have a good taste for clothes. If your wardrobe is not updated with what is trendy, you sure are depressed. Popular and easy-going. You have a little group of dignified friends, a! ll of them being quality-personified .
If you are a Slug : Always up to some sort of a mischief! The mischievous gleam in your eyes is what makes you so cute and attractive to everyone. You are an extremely fun-to-be-with kind of person. No wonder people seek your company and look forward to include you for all get-together' s. However, you are sensitive which is a drawback. People need to select their words while talking to you. If someone trie s to fiddle around and play with words while dealing with you, it is enough to invite your wrath. God bless the person then!
If you are a Cockroach: Quite contradictory to your name, you are a peace loving person. You best try to avoid a situation wherein you are required to fight. An outdoor person, you dislike sitting at one place for a long duration. You are a born leader, and have it in you how to tactfully derive work from people. You love being loved and when you receive your share of limelight from someone, you are all theirs!!!! Well, well... Hence some people could eve n take an advantage, flatter you to the maximum and get their work done. So be careful.....
If you are a Parasite : An extremely lovable, adorable person, sometimes shy, with a passion for quick wit. At times, you prefer quietness. You love exploring various things and going into depth of each thing. Under normal circumstances you're cool but when given a reason to, you are like a volcano waiting to erupt. You're a fashion bird. People look forward to you as an icon associated with fashion.. Basically, you mingle along freely but don't like talking much to strangers. People feel very easy in your company. You observe care in choosing your friends.
If you are a Skunk : You are near to perfect and nice at heart. The examples of your kindness are always circulated in groups of people. You, too, love peace. You wouldn't like to retaliate even to a person who is in the wrong. You are loved due to this. You do not wish to talk behind one's back. People love the way you always treat them. You can give, give, and give love, and the best part is that you do not expect it back in return. You are generous enough. Seeing things in a practical l ight is what remains the best trait of you guys.
If you are a Bullfrog: You symbolize a very happy-go-lucky approach in life. Whatever the surroundings may be, grim or cheerful, you remain unaffected. In fact, you spread cheer wherever you go. You are the leader of your group of friends and good at consoling people in their times of need. You dislike hypocrisy and tend to shirk away from hypocrites. They can never be in your good books, no matter what. You are very methodical and organized in your work. No amount of mess, hence, can ever encompass you. Beware, it is easy for you to fall in love....
If you are a Snake : You are mysterious. You are someone who can handle pressure with ease, and can handle any atmosphere without going berserk. You can be mean at times, and love to gossip with your selected group. Very prim and proper. You like all situations and things to be in the way you desire, which, sometimes is not possible. As a result, you may lose out in some relationships. But otherwise, you love to help people out from difficult and tight spots when they really need you.
If you are an Ape : Very impatient and hyper!!! You want things to be done as quick as possible.. At heart, you are quite simple and love if you are the center of attraction. That way, you people are unique.. You would like to keep yourself safe from all the angles. Shall your name be dragged or featured in any sort of a controversy, you then go all panicky. Therefore, you take your precautions from the very beginning. When you foresee anything wrong, your sixth sense is what saves you from falling in traps. Quite a money minded bunch you people are!!!!
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| Comments |
 sexki... |
March 30, 2009 (Report It)
I'm a slug |
 LV_2_... |
March 01, 2009 (Report It)
damm im april 2 |
 Juicy... |
January 04, 2009 (Report It)
Well i am an ape but doesn't fit me in some areas lol |
 Trini... |
January 03, 2009 (Report It)
"An extremely lovable, adorable person, sometimes shy, with a passion for quick wit."
I have no quick wit.. maybe slow wit..lol
"At times, you prefer quietness. You love exploring various things and going into depth of each thing. Under normal circumstances you're cool but when given a reason to, you are like a volcano waiting to erupt."
I'll give you that one :)
"You're a fashion bird. People look forward to you as an icon associated with fashion.."
not
"Basically, you mingle along freely but don't like talking much to strangers. People feel very easy in your company. You observe care in choosing your friends."
I love talking to strangers.. and I am friends with many! |
 Syles... |
December 05, 2008 (Report It)
I'm a skunk:) |
 Miss_... |
December 05, 2008 (Report It)
Ima snake! |
 LeiaS... |
December 05, 2008 (Report It)
I'm a skunk |
 krypt... |
December 03, 2008 (Report It)
im an ape and yep it fits me LoL |
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Servants
8:16PM on November 16, 2008
Seducing my hot servant
Maid / Servant
Hi guys and girls, I am Vanita again from coin batore. Here I give you my recent experience with my servant. I thank all those who appreciated my previous 2 stories. t my home normally my mother only does all the household chores.
As she had some health breakdown and feeling weak, we arranged for a maid to do the washing the clothes and dishes and other work. Actually, it is a very big task to find a maid within our budget these days. Finally, we got one named Vanita.
She was 36 years old and had 2 children. She used to come in the morning and in the evenings. To describe, she was not a very good looking lady, tan, bit oily hair, and always use to wear dark-colored sarees.
The thing to notice is her ass that was really big for her overall structure and when she moves it moves like two heavenly bodies left alone. She used to wear her saree much below her navel, so I had several chances to see the compass-made hole.
About her boobs, I got rare chances to see the cleavage and from the side when her saree moves away. Most of the times she wore a white bra. This with the combination with dark blouse some times gives the exact size of the boobs which were really BIG.
I did not have much chance to communicate with her except occasionally. I work in night shift, so even though I will be there at home the whole day my mother will also be at home throughout. I could not make any bold moves for about a month
and my mother’s health was improving, and when she is totally okay there will be no need for the maid, So I was very worried that I will not get a chance to feel Vanita’s body. I don’t know if it was by luck or coincidence, my cousin (sister) moved from Madurai to Coimbatore
and more luckily they were able to rent a house just 5 houses away from our house and my cousin came with her new born baby which was her first child. My mother is very fond of kids and as my cousin had problems handling the baby and asked my mother’s help.
My mother started to spend more time with the baby. This was encouraging me with my move towards Vanita. On a fine Wednesday, my mother told me that she is going with my cousin to a temple at Karamadai. I asked not to strain herself.
She said that they are taking a call taxi so there I don’t have to worry. She left the home early at 7 a.m. to avoid the heat. I was very happy because I know that when my mother returns it be afternoon. I was going to have a plenty of time with Vanita.
At around 7:45, Vanita came in I was in lying in the bed and pretending to be asleep. She came in and searched for my mother but could not find her and she did not want to wake me up. She started sweeping the floor..
She came in to bedroom and as she thought I was asleep she did not care to cover her assets. With my little opened eye, I could see her cleavage. On that day, she was wearing an orange saree and matching blouse and as usual white bra.
She came near me in the sweeping process. Her ass was facing me. Now I thought of going at it. I pretended to roll over and put my palm on her ass. She was shocked and stood up, but I did not show any trace of me knowing that and continued to pretend as if I am asleep.
She started her work again. The touch of ass, the heat and wetness I felt made me passionate. I could not control it. I made some sounds and woke up and asked her when did she come and she said just a few minutes before.
I walked past her back to the door and turned back and asked her that did she sit somewhere in dirt. She asked why am I asking that. I said it you wear a nice saree and there is something dirty in the back. She got up and searched for the dirt in the back and could not find any.
I went in for help saying no no not there I will show you and with my full-stretched palm I touched one of ass completely and pressed it a bit ….She acted as if a current passed through her body and saw me in my eyes. I said it is here.
I said come to mirror I will show. She moved with me. I made stand so that her back is facing the mirror and she is facing me. I told her now look at that and at the moment she turned towards the mirror from front I caught hold of her whole ass
with both of my hands and said see it is all over here. Again I felt the shiver passing through her body. She could not turn towards the mirror anymore. I kept saying see here it is too dirty and oily and continued squeeze her buttocks.
I did it a bit hard and a gasp for breath came out of her mouth. Then, I took my hands off her and asked did I hurt you. She said no ! I asked can I do it again. She gave out a shy smile but tried to hide that and seriously said no. I said please please only once and only one hand this time.
Actually, I was not waiting for her to agree. As I asked her I was moving my right hand simultaneously towards her ass, and she resisted a little. I managed to touch the center at the cleavage with my hand that was so hot and could feel the wetness too.
I rubbed along the center from the upper end to lower end. Now she was so close to me that her boobs were touching my chest. Now I removed my right hand and waited a second. She saw my eyes and I could read that she wanted more. I turned her towards the mirror.
Now her ass was rubbing my erection. I passed both my hands below her arms and caught hold of her milky malgovas. I slowly massaged her as well as pressing my cock to her ass and kissing her neck at the same time. I softly murmured into her ears can have some of your milk.
She said no again but I know that ladies language of yes and no had opposite meanings. I removed saree while tasting her lips. I took her to the bedroom. I sat on the bed and made her sit on lap. Then, I unhooked her blouse and I asked why do you always wear white bra.
She said she liked the white color very much. I told her that I like her skin color very much and peeled of the bra off her bumping balls. She closed her eyes with shy and told me that it is very bright in there and she has never exposed her assets out even to her husband in light,
but I said I want to see whole in full light. I took her hands of her eyes and told her to look how I play with her boobs. They were like two skinned pineapples hanging. I rubbed her nipples with my middle finger that made it very hard.
I asked her how much milk does she hold in each of those 500 mL or 1 L. I lifted her left arm and put it around my neck and licked her left breast. It tasted a bit salty first because of the superficial sweat. When I licked off the sweat layer completely off,
I was feeling the real taste. Wow it was great, simultaneously I was fondling with her right breast. All time she kept moaning and she remembered to keep them low. She was saying Thambi…..venam ………. Podhum yaravathu vandhuruvanga…
This gave me a caution not to stop but to do things a bit faster. I removed my clothes and stood nude. She could not believe that she is seeing me like that and said ayyo ennadhu idhu. I sucked her boobs and had some nutrition of whole milk
for a little more time in the same sitting position and then laid her flat on the bed. I moved from my mouth from her boobs to the navel kissing and licking and sucking. I told her that her navel was the beautiful hole I have ever seen. She was very shy to speak.
Then, I said I am going to see heaven and removed pavada (skirt) in an immaculate speed that she didn’t have enough time to restrict me. She had a lot of hair in the pubic region.. I grabbed the whole forest with my hand and asked what oil do you use to grow such long hairs here.
She uncontrollably gave a loud OOOF…. and caught my hand. I slowly parted her legs and I went inbetween. I smelled her cunt It was very aromatic and I could feel the heat within a few inches away. With a fully extended tongue I licked her vagina.
She was moving terribly now with loud AAAH SSSS AMMAA VENAM ENAKU VEKKAMA IRUKU. I inserted my tongue completely into her pussy and simultaneously sucked it with all the might and blowed in with full power alternatively.
It seemed that her she has never experienced such pleasures before. She caught my hair and pushed me towards her cunt. She blasted out her fluids, I came out fully drenched. I asked her am I making her happy. She nodded her head.
I told her now can I insert my tool into hers. She laughed and asked don’t pretend to be a nice boy. I know even if I tell no you are going to do that. Well If she is so confirmed what is the need to wait for. It is time for the blow job.
My dick already being erect for a long enough time was waiting to plunge into darkness. I parted her legs a still more and pulled her towards me. I circled around her heaven hole with my dick and very slowly put the plug in until it was fully gone.
She gave out a shriek sound. I asked her what was it. She told me her husband never reached so deep into her. Now I again very slowly retracted my tool out and then sent it in slowly. I very gradually increased the speed repeating this maneuver.
When I hit the top speed the she was shaking wildly letting out AH…AH…AAAHS. When I knew the cum was coming out, I took my thing out and sprayed the white jelly on her navel region and rubbed it all over the body.
She asked me why didn’t you come cum inside please do that, but I did not want to go for unwanted complications. I told her it is enough that she has two children and that and I will fuck her again only with condoms.
I stood up and asked her to come by the table and bend forward on it. Then I fucked her asshole to the core. She did not expect it and she has never got anything into her asshole before. After the action she told it was painful, but she liked it very much.
We both lied on the bed for sometime and then went to bath together. In the bathroom she sucked my dick as if she is very thirsty and took the whole lot of load into her mouth and swallowed it without hesitation.
It was almost 10:30 when we were dressed again to carry on the routine. When she left she told that she won’t allow me to do that unless again unless I accept that I will cum into her cunt. I don’t know why this lady is so eager to get my cum into her.
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| Comments |
 LV_2_... |
March 01, 2009 (Report It)
ooo dammm |
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A Crazy day...
6:36PM on September 01, 2008
It started all cool, get up,
go get a coffee. My man calls me,
yo i need u to meet me at the spot.
So i go's to the spot, focused on $$$$,mind and problems.
so i get to the block there were three people waitin outside
i say whats up b,
he told me i was $350 dollar short,
i said thats crazy son,
there was three fifth in the box.
but the next morning no money to start the day.
this is first part of my day what should i have done?
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| Comments |
 sweet... |
September 20, 2008 (Report It)
well i would say to him fuck u and get ya own money |
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Women are a trip...
10:36PM on July 23, 2008
Look, I know you men have it difficult. Women are just about
> impossible to understand, much less please. In a post-feminist
> society, you never know exactly what you should be doing. Women are
> bloody picky, I know we are. It can be scary, too, when women freak
> out about what appear to be benign issues. And men who do their
best
> to be respectful, female-positive humans, I salute you, I do.
>
> But please, please just fuck me already. Honestly, I appreciate
your
> thoughtfulness. I like that you want to take things slow. I can
> totally get behind the idea of emotional connection, but
> dearjesusinheaven, FUCK ME. We've done dinner and drinks. We've
gone
> dancing. We've cuddled and watched a movie. I'm wearing a low cut
> shirt and you've been staring at my breasts all night.
> Goodgodalmighty, get to it and fuck me.
>
> When we get hot and heavy, please take charge. Please, please fuck
> me. Trust me, I'm not going to just lie still - I'll get involved.
> But don't make me force your hand into my panties. That makes me
feel
> like a rapist. We've been kissing for a half hour and your hand
keeps
> grazing my ass. That's nice, but it's time to move forward. Get on
> top of me. Don't make me get on top right out of the gate and start
> bobbing up and down on your cock like I'm practicing some crazy new
> aerobic yoga because YOU won't go down on me. Roll on top and start
> dry humping like a good boy should. Don't gently suck my nipples
and
> then pull back when I moan with pleasure. You being coy is totally
> not what I want. It's not what WE want.
>
> OK, I know it's scary. There are lots of women out there who make
> fucking really difficult. So, I have compiled some handy tips.
Don't
> think of this as complaining, or as schadenfreude for the Andrea
> Dworkins of the world. Just some simple tips, for timid men who
have
> forgotten what it means to fuck like men:
>
> 1. Taking charge is not bad. Oh, there will be some women who feel
> that you are pushy. If you are making out with a woman, and she
> starts to push back, ask nicely if things are moving too fast. If
she
> says yes, say something like "I'm sorry - you just look so fucking
> delicious. I'll go slower." Otherwise, skillfully move forward. If
> you start kissing a woman, and she responds well, and before long,
> you're both on the floor with her skirt pushed up, and you on top
of
> her, it's not the time to roll onto your back and start awkwardly
> stroking the top of her head. Seriously, grow a goddamn pair.
YOU'RE
> the man. Act like one.
>
> 2. Ohmyfuckinggod, please learn to respect the clit. It's different
> for every woman, so ask what she likes. Do not, I repeat, do not
just
> wiggle your fingers around her pussy like you're trying to tickle
> her. Do not drum your fingertips against her vulva like you are
> impatiently waiting at the Sears Tire Center for your receipt. Do
not
> push the clit like it is a doorbell at some house that you need to
> get inside of. Start by using all four fingers with firm yet gentle
> pressure against the outside of her pussy. Do not charge in with a
> single finger and start jabbing at things. And if you really don't
> know what to do, ask her. Just ask. "How do you like it?". It's a
> simple question, and most women will answer straight out. If she's
> being all coy, ask "Do you like pressure? Is it sensitive?" The
> clitoris is a varied item, indeed. Treat each one as though you
have
> never encountered one before. Forget everything that your last
> partner liked.
>
> 3. Most women like to be fucked, and fucked well. Yes, there are
> women out there who want to "make love" every time - sweet, gentle,
> rocking love with lots of eye contact and loving kisses. Those
women
> are not the majority. The majority like to be pounded. The majority
> like to have their hair pulled. The majority like a good, solid
> jackhammering. When a woman is bucking wildly against you, it's not
> because she wants you to pull back and slowly swirl your cock
around
> her vagina like you're mixing a cake batter up there. It's because
> she wants you to hold down her arms, or grab her hips, or push her
> legs above her head, and fuck her harder. Don't be too afraid of
what
> this means as far as gender equality goes - I am a raging feminist
> bitch, but I still want to be penetrated like you are planning on
> fucking my throat from the inside out.
>
> 4. A little roughness is nice. Do not pretend that you had no idea
> that some women like their hair pulled. Do not act shocked if she
> wants you to spank her ("Really? Spanking? Won't it hurt?" - yes,
it
> does. That's the fucking point). We know you've read Stuff and
Maxim,
> and that's all those laddie mags talk about in their "How to Please
> Her" sections. Start with light, full handed smacks to the area of
> her ass that she sits on. Judge her response and continue on from
> there. You don't have to bend her over one knee and tell her she's
a
> naughty girl and that Daddy's going to punish her; save that for
the
> fifth date. Women are less delicate than you think, so don't worry
> about breaking her hip.
>
> 5. It's OK for you to make noise. Otherwise, we feel like we are
> fucking a ninja. Unless you actually are a ninja, and have sneaked
> into our rooms with vibrating nanuchaku and zippered black pajamas,
> please, please make some noise. If you're banging a woman, and
she's
> crying out and saying your name and moaning, and you can't even
> manage a grunt, she's going to feel like an idiot. You don't have
to
> make the sounds she is making, but do SOMETHING. You know how when
> you are watching porn, and the girl does something great to the guy
> and the guy kind of goes "Ah!", half grunt, half yell? That's HOT.
Do
> that. Whisper our name (assuming you know it) gruffly. Groan
against
> her neck when you're in missionary position. You don't have to
grunt
> like a mountain gorilla, but if you are totally mute, she's going
to
> get worried.
>
> 6. Most women like dirty talk, in addition to the grunting. If
you'd
> like to get some dirty talk going, ask her if she likes the way you
> fuck her. If she responds well, continue with something like, "I
love
> fucking you. God, you look so fucking hot." Is she still moaning in
> response? "Your tits are so beautiful." Does that work? If she
> doesn't respond well to the term "tits", you might have to stop
> there. If she keep moaning or responding, pass Go and collect $200.
> Try the following:
>
> "Oh, god. Your pussy is SO tight."
> "You're so wet - are you wet because you like the feel of my cock
> ramming you?"
> "I think I'm going to come inside you. I'm going to fill up your
> little cunt." It doesn't matter that you're wearing a condom; we
LOVE
> hearing this.
>
> If all of those work, you can then progress to things like "sexy
> little bitch" and "dirty whore". Tread carefully, but please,
tread.
> Do not tiptoe. Do not sit down. Charge.
>
> 6. You're not obligated to eat a woman out. In return, she's not
> obligated to choke on your dick. Don't skip one and expect the
other.
> If you do eat a woman out, the only comment you should make about
her
> pussy is how nice it is. The length of her labia minora, the color
of
> her interior, her waxing job or full bush - you are not John
Madden.
> No time for color commentary.
>
> 7. Do not bitch about condoms. Oh, we hate them. Trust us. They
hurt
> us more than they hurt you. But we don't want to be preggers, and
you
> don't want to catch anything, right? Don't whine about condom sex.
Do
> not explain that you can't come with one on. LEARN to come with one
> on, or if not, help us figure out what to do with you once we're
> satisfied and it's time for you to let loose your load.
>
> 8. We really like it when you come. It's called a money shot for a
> reason. Watching semen shoot out of you is one of the most
gratifying
> things EVER. However, do not assume that she wants you to jack it
off
> onto her face. She might, but don't assume. Seeing and/or feeling
you
> come is rewarding for us, so there's no need to deprive us of it,
but
> please do consult us before unleashing. "I think I'm going to come -
> how do you like it?" is a fair question that shouldn't rob you of
> your testicles.
>
> In recent memory, I've been fucked by a very aggressive, manly guy,
> and I've been... well, fucked is the wrong term here. I've been
> penetrated by a total and utter wuss. Who am I going to run back to
> when I'm ready for my fill? Manly McHardon, that's who. ------------
--
> ------------ --------- --------- --------
>
> *New point of clarification - some people have brought up some
really
> great issues in response to this post, so let me say this: I don't
> mean to imply that all women like to be treated like whores. I do
> mean to say that most women I know have told me that they like sex
> rougher than most men give it to them. Rough does NOT equal chains
> and bondage. And this applies to the bedroom only, and does not
mean
> that she wants you to choose her dinner for her, or treat her like
> less of a person. **Some women have said that they don't like it
> rough and what the hell am I thinking? Well, girls, you're in the
> minority. HOWEVER, all women need to remember that, in addition to
be
> straight forward about your sexual desires, you need to be straight
> forward about your sexual limits. Don't be afraid to ask for more,
> but when something feels wrong, say so. Don't ever do something you
> don't want to do in silence and then blame the guy. Silence is
> dangerous
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| Comments |
 Camgi... |
October 10, 2008 (Report It)
Wonderful |
 MzBoo... |
September 03, 2008 (Report It)
Loved it. Great READ!!! |
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roses
10:10PM on July 20, 2008
Sometimes they come in red
They are use to symbolize love
Sometimes they come in white
They are use to make friends
Sometimes they come in blue
They are use to my somebody feel extra special.
Sometimes they come in yellow
They are use on every hoilday
So roses are use make people fell happy
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Roses the remix
10:08PM on July 20, 2008
Roses are a symbol of death
People throw roses at ur funeral
Also roses have Thorn's
The jews put a Thorn crown around jesus head as a symbol of hate.
They also have green leaves
Symbolize the greed for love to use a rose
So overall roses have a good and bad side to it.
You feel me.....©just
like people.....
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